Mass Shaunodus

Yesterday, I had dinner with S. who is moving back to the mainland. I wasn't really prepared for the drama... and luckily managed to avoid it all. The drama came today via SMS... but I suppose it was all my fault, because really, I could have just not said anything and stayed perfectly quiet... which, retrospectively, is clearly what I should have done-- keep ones opinions to oneself.

And ULTE2 packed up his stuff and moved out again. I think this is the 3rd time, although I must admit that I'm having a little bit of difficulty keeping track. The process itself was drama-free, but that which necessarily led up to it was drama-filled. I do not like to raise my voice. I almost always prefer to walk away. (see, most of the time, I'm perfectly capable of keeping my opinions to myself) But what does one do when one is getting yelled at for no reason? This "You're too depressed, it's impossible to be around you" and "You're too happy, it's impossible to be around you" oscillation is reminiscent of the "office too cold" versus "office too hot" debate... only this seems to come from one person as opposed to two distinct parties who, I would imagine, experience temperatures differently. If this had begun as an experiment to see whether I could live with someone, it is a failed experiment. I think it is entirely possible for me to live with someone... just not ULTE2, who is looking for an excuse to move on anyway.

The thing with BNs is pretty much done. I am entirely happy with the conclusion, because it brought me to the Bluepath, which is a huge milestone in my life. I also received just enough additional information to understand the whole insistence on delusion-- it is all done in the name of assuaging one's conscience (not mine, my conscience is fine-- there's a lot to be said for consistent honesty and openness).

I'm still waiting for those stickers to arrive... and am becoming increasingly impatient. The hot weather has repeatedly melted the wax just enough that it's starting to flake off. I need to strip the board soon (yesterday)... but I want to strip it, put the sticker on, and *then* wax it. I don't want to have the stickers arrive and then have to wait for the next time I strip the board.

Surfrider. It's going to happen. We're going to make it happen. I ran into one of the people at Thursday's meeting while picking up stuff at the Co-op, and we chatted for a bit about how we're going to get things going (as far as I'm concerned, nothing ever goes quickly enough or efficiently enough). It turns out that this guy's girlfriend is the woman I've spoken with many times on the phone at my work and at my business-- and I'd always wondered whether or not she knew that she was referring business to the same person she was asking questions to at my office... and as it turns out, she appreciated my help so much that her boyfriend has heard about me... but none of all of this was connected until this evening.

And if you think this makes me feel like my world is shrinking, Simon's wife turns out to be the wedding coordinator that's been assigning weddings to ULTE2.

There are probably more connections... but I will avoid thinking about them. Otherwise I'd have "It's a small world afterall" playing on a loop inside my head... and if you think the song is annoying in English, you should hear it in Cantonese, which is the version my brain always defaults to. It hurts so much that I wish I had had a cyanide cap put on my teeth.

This whole exercise of opening and closing the Cox Bay washrooms is starting to make itself felt. I have to put on my hoodie and drive out to Cox Bay right now... instead of preparing for preparing breakfast... or sleeping... which seems like an excellent, if abstract concept from where I sit.