"I'm not even willing to give up brown rice for you... and I don't even like brown rice!"
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Focus
Uh oh. I'm not surfing enough. I need to surf more. I must go surfing tomorrow. I must go surfing tomorrow. I must go surfing tomorrow. If I took a 30K pay cut to be here, I'd better be surfing every day... maybe even twice a day.
I've been distracted and not surfing everyday. I was on Flores all day on Sunday (yes, I stayed overnight in a small village that has confirmed cases of swine flu; no, I am not concerned) and was hanging out with DCMS on Monday night debating the finer points of semantics. Tuesday was a disappointing surf day with microwaves and lots of shortboarders. Wedenesday was... yesterday... I had a Care Bear play date with a friend's 4 year old. I still feel the same as I always have about children, but this kid is pretty cool. She's 4, speaks in grammatically correct full sentences, and loves Care Bears. I brought my 8 Care Bears over and we had a Care Bear night... watched the Care Bear Big Wish Movie and coloured Care Bear colouring pages with wax crayons... I went home with 7 Care Bears-- this is progress in putting aside childish things... which seems somehow important seeing as I'm turning 30 in a few months.
Tonight was dinner with a bunch of work friends and then climbing. I haven't climbed in I don't know how long... and I was really feeling it. But it was probably also sleep deprivation. I didn't end up going to bed yesterday until 2AM... busily learning the difference between fuckiness and non-fuckiness... and being grateful for that which is comfortable, familiar, and drama-free. Anything more complicated than absolutely straightforward is going to detract from my focus... and that's what I need right now... focus on surfing every day. Every day. EVERY day... starting tomorrow.
Tonight was dinner with a bunch of work friends and then climbing. I haven't climbed in I don't know how long... and I was really feeling it. But it was probably also sleep deprivation. I didn't end up going to bed yesterday until 2AM... busily learning the difference between fuckiness and non-fuckiness... and being grateful for that which is comfortable, familiar, and drama-free. Anything more complicated than absolutely straightforward is going to detract from my focus... and that's what I need right now... focus on surfing every day. Every day. EVERY day... starting tomorrow.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
The Cheque is in the Mail
I got an e-mail from my old compensation advisor today telling me that my annual leave has been cashed out and that I'll be receiving a cheque in the mail soon. I asked her how much I should be expecting... it was a surprisingly large amount, especially since I used up as much of my leave as I could prior to leaving that job.
So I looked up the rate of pay for my old job... and then had to spend the rest of the afternoon repeating the phrase "I am perfectly happy here"...
I knew I took a pay cut to come here... but I didn't know that it's a $30,000 pay cut. Holy crap... intel analysts get paid way too much.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here...
So I looked up the rate of pay for my old job... and then had to spend the rest of the afternoon repeating the phrase "I am perfectly happy here"...
I knew I took a pay cut to come here... but I didn't know that it's a $30,000 pay cut. Holy crap... intel analysts get paid way too much.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here.
I am perfectly happy here...
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
It is in my nature...
I can't stop procrastinating! I should be doing work on public governance and microeconomics, but instead, all I want to do is talk on the phone and write on here. I don't know what the rest of the week is going to look like... but one thing is for sure, that power outage taught me nothing.
I've been giving my perfect day a lot of thought... and I want to retell the story from the beginning. But to jump ahead for a second... I went out for a surf tonight in the microwaves. It was probably the most disappointing surf since June. It was small and crowded... and I ran into SAIS in the parking lot. I wasn't very friendly... I'm afraid I might be harbouring a bit of resentment about his role in the thwarted sticker bombing... that, and I find his conversation dull and uninteresting-- there is nothing about either his nor my B&B that interests me enough to be a topic of conversation. In fact, at this time of the year, I'm sufficiently done with it that I find myself almost pretending that I don't have a B&B to run. But never mind all that...
How did I end up having to rely on the kindess of strangers?
I have, as evidenced by an earlier entry on here, considered the possibility of getting stuck in Ahousaht and not being able to get back to Tofino before even committing to going on this hike. I knew that it was a possibility... but chose to do nothing about it. This was due mostly to the fact that I've been trying something different lately. I decided to train myself to count on other people... and DCMS, being a far superior outdoorsman, seems to me to be the perfect person with whom to complete this training exercise. To this end, I did a few things differently. First, I left the transportation details to him entirely. Second, I did not research the route we are taking, except for to find out how long it is. Third, I decided to under-pack for the hike, despite that I always over-pack with emergency supplies and extras for others. Previously, people counted on me to be prepared... now, it was my turn to count on someone else. Without consultation or coordination, I assumed that he would be packing the emergency supplies. I brought only what was personally required for myself, with nothing for contingency. My assumptions proved to be correct very early on. DCMS had packed everything, up to and including a neck brace-- seriously.
This is more control than I have ever relinquished. Surprisingly, it wasn't all that difficult.
I've been giving my perfect day a lot of thought... and I want to retell the story from the beginning. But to jump ahead for a second... I went out for a surf tonight in the microwaves. It was probably the most disappointing surf since June. It was small and crowded... and I ran into SAIS in the parking lot. I wasn't very friendly... I'm afraid I might be harbouring a bit of resentment about his role in the thwarted sticker bombing... that, and I find his conversation dull and uninteresting-- there is nothing about either his nor my B&B that interests me enough to be a topic of conversation. In fact, at this time of the year, I'm sufficiently done with it that I find myself almost pretending that I don't have a B&B to run. But never mind all that...
How did I end up having to rely on the kindess of strangers?
I have, as evidenced by an earlier entry on here, considered the possibility of getting stuck in Ahousaht and not being able to get back to Tofino before even committing to going on this hike. I knew that it was a possibility... but chose to do nothing about it. This was due mostly to the fact that I've been trying something different lately. I decided to train myself to count on other people... and DCMS, being a far superior outdoorsman, seems to me to be the perfect person with whom to complete this training exercise. To this end, I did a few things differently. First, I left the transportation details to him entirely. Second, I did not research the route we are taking, except for to find out how long it is. Third, I decided to under-pack for the hike, despite that I always over-pack with emergency supplies and extras for others. Previously, people counted on me to be prepared... now, it was my turn to count on someone else. Without consultation or coordination, I assumed that he would be packing the emergency supplies. I brought only what was personally required for myself, with nothing for contingency. My assumptions proved to be correct very early on. DCMS had packed everything, up to and including a neck brace-- seriously.
This is more control than I have ever relinquished. Surprisingly, it wasn't all that difficult.
On one of the many beaches we walked on, there were many moonsnail shells strewn about. I have not been one to take things away from beaches... but while on this beach, I thought it would be an excellent idea to take a moonsnail shell back to Tofino to send it to Tina, who would then be obligated to bring it back to Flores Island. I haven't heard from her in far too long... so I decided to poach this shell and make her come out. Of course, I've got to get it to the post office first...
I want to go back to that trail again, and-- I can hardly believe I'm saying this-- would probably camp for a night in order to spend more time on the beaches. On our way there, I was looking forward to seeing every beach again on the way back... but because DCMS was seriously limping by the time we got to the end-- he was really not in a good way... walking with two sticks and took up my offer to carry his pack for him (this was actually a little impressive, almost every guy I know would have been too macho and stupid to hand it over)-- we didn't come back the same way we went out... so now I feel like I'm not quite done and want to go back.
As much as this was an exercise for me in relinquishing control, I believe it was an exercise for DCMS is figuring out what to do with me... I was stuck in his "to sort" pile and didn't quite fit in any of the categories with which he organizes the people in his life. It felt at times like he was testing the properties of an unknown substance.
(I had to back-date this post... I fell asleep while composing it... and I'm not likely to finish it any time soon... this is bad... I'm bordering on narcoleptic...)
Monday, September 14, 2009
A Photo from Somewhere
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
Sunday, September 13, 2009
A Perfect Day
So... DCMS and I decided to do the Wild Side Trail on Flores Island. This trail starts in the village of Ahousaht, a first nations reserve, links together a series of remote sandy beaches, and ends 11kms later in Cow Bay.
We had originally agreed to meet at the 1st Street Dock at 8:45... but he hit the snooze button a few times too many and we were delayed by about a half hour.
The trail was beautifully designed and maintained, and led to many inspiring places. The hike presented me with beauty beyond what I knew to hope for.
Before we got to the end, DCMS's right knee began protesting. He decided to drag it along despite its protests, and, while we managed to get to the end, the return trip was less pleasant due to increasing pain and decreasing mobility. I was enjoying the leisurely pace, but would have enjoyed it more had it not stemmed from the suffering of another.
When we got back to the village and near the dock, we ran into a man walking a pack of dogs (this is quite accurate and there's no exaggeration). DCMS asked him how to go about getting a water taxi back to Tofino, and was informed that all the water taxis have already left. The man with the dogs, Alec, invited us to his home and tried to radio a water taxi for us. None, however, was to be had. Alec and his wife, Darlene, gave us tea and bread (with everything that one could conceivably put on bread and in tea) and invited us to spend the night.
I am composing this note in their guest bed. Their generousness moves me profoundly. I am filled with gratitude for the kindness of strangers. I am stuck in Ahousaht, and I am grateful for it.
As for the rest, I guess I'll have to figure it out tomorrow.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
We had originally agreed to meet at the 1st Street Dock at 8:45... but he hit the snooze button a few times too many and we were delayed by about a half hour.
The trail was beautifully designed and maintained, and led to many inspiring places. The hike presented me with beauty beyond what I knew to hope for.
Before we got to the end, DCMS's right knee began protesting. He decided to drag it along despite its protests, and, while we managed to get to the end, the return trip was less pleasant due to increasing pain and decreasing mobility. I was enjoying the leisurely pace, but would have enjoyed it more had it not stemmed from the suffering of another.
When we got back to the village and near the dock, we ran into a man walking a pack of dogs (this is quite accurate and there's no exaggeration). DCMS asked him how to go about getting a water taxi back to Tofino, and was informed that all the water taxis have already left. The man with the dogs, Alec, invited us to his home and tried to radio a water taxi for us. None, however, was to be had. Alec and his wife, Darlene, gave us tea and bread (with everything that one could conceivably put on bread and in tea) and invited us to spend the night.
I am composing this note in their guest bed. Their generousness moves me profoundly. I am filled with gratitude for the kindness of strangers. I am stuck in Ahousaht, and I am grateful for it.
As for the rest, I guess I'll have to figure it out tomorrow.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
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