Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Sunday, June 28, 2009
On the path of joy...
I'M A SURFER!
I made the Long Beach Surf Shop Blog! No way!!!
http://www.longbeachsurfshop.com/tofinoblog/
WAAAAAAY! That's me and the Bluepath on that waaaaave!
I made the Long Beach Surf Shop Blog! No way!!!
http://www.longbeachsurfshop.com/tofinoblog/
WAAAAAAY! That's me and the Bluepath on that waaaaave!
On the Fourfold Root of Sufficient Happiness
Thank you, to you who have pointed out that surfing, napping, and eating burritos only addresses three measures out of four on the HSH. I assure you that it is decorum only that prevents me from elaborating on the unmentioned measure. It's all good.
I got kicked out of the surf last night again. I was just south of Lovekin, and saw four sea lions just outside of me. I stared at them for a while, and eventually, they continued onwards to Incinerator Rock. I was being self-congratulatory about not freaking out and staying out by myself, when I noticed ten to fifteen sea lions to my left, between me and the beach. They were totally staring at me and making menacing sounds. That was totally not cool. They were all watching me and looking like they were going to start messing with me... so I caught the next one in and called it a day.
This evening, I had a dinner party to go to, but ended up showing up three hours after it started because I was surfing at Cox Bay. Everyone who was anyone was out there... I couldn't tell who's who in the surf, which was overhead and clean on the outside... but I saw all their cars in the parking lot.
Right now, having had a full day of cleaning... plus one, three, and four on the HSH, I'm ready to hit number two on the HSH-- sleep... except there's a blueberry coffee cake that needs to come out of the oven in about 15 minutes... I guess I'd better wait.
I got kicked out of the surf last night again. I was just south of Lovekin, and saw four sea lions just outside of me. I stared at them for a while, and eventually, they continued onwards to Incinerator Rock. I was being self-congratulatory about not freaking out and staying out by myself, when I noticed ten to fifteen sea lions to my left, between me and the beach. They were totally staring at me and making menacing sounds. That was totally not cool. They were all watching me and looking like they were going to start messing with me... so I caught the next one in and called it a day.
This evening, I had a dinner party to go to, but ended up showing up three hours after it started because I was surfing at Cox Bay. Everyone who was anyone was out there... I couldn't tell who's who in the surf, which was overhead and clean on the outside... but I saw all their cars in the parking lot.
Right now, having had a full day of cleaning... plus one, three, and four on the HSH, I'm ready to hit number two on the HSH-- sleep... except there's a blueberry coffee cake that needs to come out of the oven in about 15 minutes... I guess I'd better wait.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Surfing, Napping, and Eating Burritos...
Yes, I agree, I am starting to sound more and more like the surf bum that many of you thought I had set out to become. The fact of the matter is that I never did set out to become a surf bum... so whether or not I become one now is not about the achievement of any sort of goal.
And yes, pretty much all I want to do now is surf, nap, and eat burritos.
However... that is not what I've been doing.
Well, that is what I've been doing, but that's not *all* I've been doing.
And yes, pretty much all I want to do now is surf, nap, and eat burritos.
However... that is not what I've been doing.
Well, that is what I've been doing, but that's not *all* I've been doing.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Seriously now!
Stickers are still not here!
Work is going beautifully... and I am almost operating at full speed. Full speed is pretty much the only speed I like... and it takes quite a bit to get me there. It used to be multiple cases on the go, people to be detained and files to be prepared for hearings... all before the morning shift arrives.
The surf team thing is a little fizzle-y this week because some people are away and the conditions are not good... but that will change. There was a fierce wind out there, and Cox Bay looked horrible. Even at my most desperate (okay, maybe not my *most* desperate), I wouldn't have gone out there today. I went to Long Beach... and got chatting with Simon in the parking lot. I didn't know he was Simon... because I only know Simon as a guy in a wetsuit with a blue Santa Cruz longboard... 10'2", maybe. Ralph let me take it out once, when he was selling it. Without the blue Santa Cruz, Simon could be anyone... and this guy has normal clothes on and his board in a bag... how could I possibly tell?
We were talking about my new 11' board (because I cannot shut up about it), and Simon told me that Ralph really was thinking of buying the Bluepath... and that I had in a way pulled the rug out from underneath him. Later on, when I decided to go out... and Simon saw the board, he said "I know that fin! I was going to buy that fin!" As it turns out... I got what could have been Ralph's board and what could have been Simon's fin. I snaked two Tofino longboard icons on acquisition! And apparently, Miki Dora used to ride on almost the exact same fin.
That the Bluepath is awesome is no news to me, of course.... but today... I had another reminder of its awesomeness. I caught this super awesome ride on the green-- it was the biggest, fastest ride ever. It was long distance-wise... but it was SO fast! As I was riding the wave, I was thinking "Why am I going so fast? This is really fast... what's going on? How am I able to go this fast? It's fast! Really, really fast! And I'm on it... going really fast!".... and on and on.
I am so in love.
I went back out and over and over again... but I still could not get over how awesome and how fast that ride was. I still can't. And if I hadn't been chased out of the water, I would probably still be there right now. While sitting on my board past the break, I saw two sea lions about 40 feet away, out and to my left... which was too close. That pair disappeared into the water, and I was prepared to get out of there. Not 10 seconds later, two sea lions popped up 20 feet from me, directly between me and the coming waves... then two more popped up... and there were four sea lions in a row, not 20 feet from me, looking at me, close enough for direct eye contact, making menacing grunting noises. I got the hell out of there... and fast!
Work is going beautifully... and I am almost operating at full speed. Full speed is pretty much the only speed I like... and it takes quite a bit to get me there. It used to be multiple cases on the go, people to be detained and files to be prepared for hearings... all before the morning shift arrives.
The surf team thing is a little fizzle-y this week because some people are away and the conditions are not good... but that will change. There was a fierce wind out there, and Cox Bay looked horrible. Even at my most desperate (okay, maybe not my *most* desperate), I wouldn't have gone out there today. I went to Long Beach... and got chatting with Simon in the parking lot. I didn't know he was Simon... because I only know Simon as a guy in a wetsuit with a blue Santa Cruz longboard... 10'2", maybe. Ralph let me take it out once, when he was selling it. Without the blue Santa Cruz, Simon could be anyone... and this guy has normal clothes on and his board in a bag... how could I possibly tell?
We were talking about my new 11' board (because I cannot shut up about it), and Simon told me that Ralph really was thinking of buying the Bluepath... and that I had in a way pulled the rug out from underneath him. Later on, when I decided to go out... and Simon saw the board, he said "I know that fin! I was going to buy that fin!" As it turns out... I got what could have been Ralph's board and what could have been Simon's fin. I snaked two Tofino longboard icons on acquisition! And apparently, Miki Dora used to ride on almost the exact same fin.
That the Bluepath is awesome is no news to me, of course.... but today... I had another reminder of its awesomeness. I caught this super awesome ride on the green-- it was the biggest, fastest ride ever. It was long distance-wise... but it was SO fast! As I was riding the wave, I was thinking "Why am I going so fast? This is really fast... what's going on? How am I able to go this fast? It's fast! Really, really fast! And I'm on it... going really fast!".... and on and on.
I am so in love.
I went back out and over and over again... but I still could not get over how awesome and how fast that ride was. I still can't. And if I hadn't been chased out of the water, I would probably still be there right now. While sitting on my board past the break, I saw two sea lions about 40 feet away, out and to my left... which was too close. That pair disappeared into the water, and I was prepared to get out of there. Not 10 seconds later, two sea lions popped up 20 feet from me, directly between me and the coming waves... then two more popped up... and there were four sea lions in a row, not 20 feet from me, looking at me, close enough for direct eye contact, making menacing grunting noises. I got the hell out of there... and fast!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
You don't have a dilemma, and that wasn't a tautology.
(Stickers are still not here. They had better arrive soon, because the more time I have to think about it, the more outrageous my sticker bomb targets become.)
In general, I get along okay in the world... but sometimes I lose it. Today, I lost it. I "went off" on someone who misused the word "dilemma"... it wasn't that I was feeling ungenerous... it was that the word "dilemma" is so often abused that I felt it was time someone stood up for it. I felt a little bit bad about it... because really, what are the feelings of a word compared to the infinitely more fragile feelings of a person? Luckily, she's super cool and didn't mind the freak out. I guess she accepts that I am just a little bit weird with words sometimes. I work with some truly generous people, and am grateful for the privilege of being around them.
And... on a somewhat related note. I got busted for using the word "whence" in an official communique. I had gotten it past all but one person. It was approved without comment by everyone who had to approve it for publication. It was published, distributed, advertised &c... and no one had made any remark about it. But then at lunch today, one guy looked at me and said "WHENCE???" Initially, all I was going to do was to make a face... but then I felt that, since so many people seem to have totally and without remark accepted its use, this must be the time for "whence" to return to regular usage! Perhaps it has already returned to regular usage. Perhaps its return has been so widely accepted that everyone uses the word, and it wasn't even I who used it! So I posited that it's a regular, everyday word. He didn't buy it, but I really believe that it's an irreplaceable and necessary word... there really is no substitute for it... it works better in compound phrases and never presents the dangling preposition problem. Bring "whence" back!
I had to go to a work thing this evening, and so didn't get to surf. Tomorrow night, though, will be a surf team night. It's supposed to go up to 3 to 4 meters... which is bigger than I now need it to be... because all I want to do is walk the blue path.
And... on a somewhat related note. I got busted for using the word "whence" in an official communique. I had gotten it past all but one person. It was approved without comment by everyone who had to approve it for publication. It was published, distributed, advertised &c... and no one had made any remark about it. But then at lunch today, one guy looked at me and said "WHENCE???" Initially, all I was going to do was to make a face... but then I felt that, since so many people seem to have totally and without remark accepted its use, this must be the time for "whence" to return to regular usage! Perhaps it has already returned to regular usage. Perhaps its return has been so widely accepted that everyone uses the word, and it wasn't even I who used it! So I posited that it's a regular, everyday word. He didn't buy it, but I really believe that it's an irreplaceable and necessary word... there really is no substitute for it... it works better in compound phrases and never presents the dangling preposition problem. Bring "whence" back!
I had to go to a work thing this evening, and so didn't get to surf. Tomorrow night, though, will be a surf team night. It's supposed to go up to 3 to 4 meters... which is bigger than I now need it to be... because all I want to do is walk the blue path.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
I'm not thinking of the world anymore...
My stickers still haven't arrived. I have been checking my mail everyday, hoping to find that package from Texas in my mailbox. But it hasn't happened yet. I did, however, get a letter from SFU today... I could see "Thinking of the World" through the envelop.... and I was pretty sure that it was soliciting a donation. I wasn't even going to open it... but I did... and found that it was a letter from the English department asking for money rather than the university asking for money... and, it was sent from the Chair of the English Department, which now happens to be the prof who supervised my honours thesis... which really was nothing more than a longish paper, the length of which was such that I couldn't finish it in one night, unlike every other paper I had ever written.
Incidentally, he was also the supervisor for T's MA thesis, which I never did find out whether he finished or not. Anyway, I wrote and said hello and told him I was in Tofino, and said to look me up if he's ever out here. He wrote back and said that he would, perhaps this summer, even. Imagine that... a visit from several lifetimes ago. I think the last time I saw him might have been September 11th, 2002.
I realized that I've really, finally been able to not think of the world much anymore. This evening, my thoughts are mainly about my surfboard... my beautiful blue surfboard, with whom I had a date at Cox Bay. We were out in the small glassy surf... and I was totally in love. I was on the green and walked the blue path between the two stringers. I had an exchange with a shortboarder:
him: wow! you're getting a lot of mileage on that!
me: yup.
him: how big is that?
me: 11.
him: I'm on a 6'10"
me: that's a lot of work.
him: well, I figure the harder I work, the faster I learn.
me: yeah, I suppose, if you like pain and misery.
Mwahahaha.
Of course, it was such tiny surf today that it really was my beach... well... mine and Brigitte's... she was borrowing my 11' NSP. Every wave was green... and now she wants to get an 11' board too. Before you know it, we'll have this place looking like waikiki.
Incidentally, he was also the supervisor for T's MA thesis, which I never did find out whether he finished or not. Anyway, I wrote and said hello and told him I was in Tofino, and said to look me up if he's ever out here. He wrote back and said that he would, perhaps this summer, even. Imagine that... a visit from several lifetimes ago. I think the last time I saw him might have been September 11th, 2002.
I realized that I've really, finally been able to not think of the world much anymore. This evening, my thoughts are mainly about my surfboard... my beautiful blue surfboard, with whom I had a date at Cox Bay. We were out in the small glassy surf... and I was totally in love. I was on the green and walked the blue path between the two stringers. I had an exchange with a shortboarder:
him: wow! you're getting a lot of mileage on that!
me: yup.
him: how big is that?
me: 11.
him: I'm on a 6'10"
me: that's a lot of work.
him: well, I figure the harder I work, the faster I learn.
me: yeah, I suppose, if you like pain and misery.
Mwahahaha.
Of course, it was such tiny surf today that it really was my beach... well... mine and Brigitte's... she was borrowing my 11' NSP. Every wave was green... and now she wants to get an 11' board too. Before you know it, we'll have this place looking like waikiki.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Except it *is* all about the surf...
I played receptionist all day. It is a role I have mastered. I could do this on Broadway. I'm into it... being helpful all day long is super awesome.
Three days with no surf was getting to be a bit much... walking to exhaustion on the beach is not the same as surfing to exhaustion... it's "nice"... but it's just not the same. (I've just realized that in my mind, the word "nice" is about on par with "special"... actually, a little below, because "special" doesn't have the bastardy lineage that "nice" does... I doubt anyone notices it, but when I say "Have a nice day!" (which is exceedingly rare) I really mean "Go f*** yourself!"... so "nice" is really not "nice"... and... I must admit... I've grown more resentful of the word recently... there's really not a whole lot wrong with the word... so I had best drop it before it becomes a thing (too late, I know... I'm sorry))
Anyway... the surf is back. After checking North (small and crappy), we went out to Long Beach without checking Cox. Long Beach was choppy and bad... but we went out anyway... I got some time on the green (it's actually kind of necessary now... I am not good with not getting time on the green anymore)... and we got bored and decided to paddle around to the other side of Lovekin Rock. I have never done this before... ULTE2 and I were going to do this one day, but instead, we paddled to the inside of it and climbed on, and walked around the rock to the top). It was a long paddle today... especially for me because I didn't want to be anywhere near the rock with my beautiful, shiny new glass board... so I went waaaaay beyond the rock to get around it. One paddled close to the rock (she had an epoxy Southpoint... the exact same board as my first board)... and the other one decided to follow me, because she was borrowing my board (my Southpoint)... I should have told her... that board can crash into the rocks and survive... in fact, I have crashed it into the rocks before... and surfed through salal, too... so it was completely unnecessary to be as far out as she went. There were no more waves to be had on the other side of the rocks... and so when one complained of being tired, we all left...
Instead of going home though, I went to Cox Bay to check the surf... it looked better than Long Beach... so I went out again. It was awesome! Lots of time on the green! The lesson, I suppose... is never to skip checking Cox.
And now wherever I go... I'm looking for targets for sticker bombing. Unless something changes (i.e I get a new hobby)... there'll be stickers from here to South Island.
And... on a completely unrelated note, I have a little twist on an old saying:
The original: If you want to know your true opinion of someone, watch the effect produced in you by the first sight of a letter from him. --Arthur Schopenhauer
The twist: If you want to know your true opinion of someone, gauge your desire to sniff a sweater that he has left behind. --Ding-in-itself.
It works with sweatshirts too.
Three days with no surf was getting to be a bit much... walking to exhaustion on the beach is not the same as surfing to exhaustion... it's "nice"... but it's just not the same. (I've just realized that in my mind, the word "nice" is about on par with "special"... actually, a little below, because "special" doesn't have the bastardy lineage that "nice" does... I doubt anyone notices it, but when I say "Have a nice day!" (which is exceedingly rare) I really mean "Go f*** yourself!"... so "nice" is really not "nice"... and... I must admit... I've grown more resentful of the word recently... there's really not a whole lot wrong with the word... so I had best drop it before it becomes a thing (too late, I know... I'm sorry))
Anyway... the surf is back. After checking North (small and crappy), we went out to Long Beach without checking Cox. Long Beach was choppy and bad... but we went out anyway... I got some time on the green (it's actually kind of necessary now... I am not good with not getting time on the green anymore)... and we got bored and decided to paddle around to the other side of Lovekin Rock. I have never done this before... ULTE2 and I were going to do this one day, but instead, we paddled to the inside of it and climbed on, and walked around the rock to the top). It was a long paddle today... especially for me because I didn't want to be anywhere near the rock with my beautiful, shiny new glass board... so I went waaaaay beyond the rock to get around it. One paddled close to the rock (she had an epoxy Southpoint... the exact same board as my first board)... and the other one decided to follow me, because she was borrowing my board (my Southpoint)... I should have told her... that board can crash into the rocks and survive... in fact, I have crashed it into the rocks before... and surfed through salal, too... so it was completely unnecessary to be as far out as she went. There were no more waves to be had on the other side of the rocks... and so when one complained of being tired, we all left...
Instead of going home though, I went to Cox Bay to check the surf... it looked better than Long Beach... so I went out again. It was awesome! Lots of time on the green! The lesson, I suppose... is never to skip checking Cox.
And now wherever I go... I'm looking for targets for sticker bombing. Unless something changes (i.e I get a new hobby)... there'll be stickers from here to South Island.
And... on a completely unrelated note, I have a little twist on an old saying:
The original: If you want to know your true opinion of someone, watch the effect produced in you by the first sight of a letter from him. --Arthur Schopenhauer
The twist: If you want to know your true opinion of someone, gauge your desire to sniff a sweater that he has left behind. --Ding-in-itself.
It works with sweatshirts too.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Take the surf away, and what have you got?
The best place on earth, that's what.
It's been super windy these past two days... gale warnings have been in effect for pretty much the entire weekend. It was windy enough that it not only ruined any chance of surfing, it even messed up the dive plans. Instead of doing what we had set out to do, we just went for a dive around the corner of Grice Point... going down to a maximum depth of 50ft. The visibility was about 6 ft. It was not exactly a fun dive. Added to that was some equipment issues... for dives in the past, I've been wearing my 5/4 zipperless hooded surf wetsuit which fits me perfectly well and therefore does not flush (except in serious surf). Everyone around here thinks I'm nuts, because those who are dumb enough (or impecunious enough) to dive in a wetsuit dive in a 7+7.... which totals 14mm where I have my 5mm, and 7mm where I have my 4mm. They got a whole bunch of all new wetsuits in, and they managed to convince me to try one of their new 7+7 suits. The women's suits didn't fit, so I had on a men's. As you can probably still remember even if you haven't seen me in a while, I am not shaped like a man (though I will have to do another paragraph on this later), so it flushed considerably more than my perfectly fitted surf wetsuit. To make it even more entertaining, I had 38 pounds on my weight belt as usual... and discovered upon descent (or attempt at descent) that another 9mm of neoprene basically meant that I wasn't going down. My bouancy options were float, and float higher. Blargh. Anyway... eventually it did all work out... and I got tangled up in a bed of kelp. Blargh.
There must be something wrong with me... because I'm really looking forward to the next dive.
Since I wasn't going surfing (couldn't surf on Friday night either... went for a walk on Schooner and Long Beach instead... it looked nasty at Cox (there were kite surfers out... never a good sign)) , I went to Comber's Beach for a walk instead. I hadn't been there for a couple of years. The last time I was there, it was with Tina during the winter of my 27th year... I remember drawing sierpinski gaskets in the sand. Comber's Beach was the first beach I saw on my first trip to Tofino on the May long weekend in 2006. We saw it at low tide, and there were many of this sort of jellyfish thing that seemed to have a sail. I've since found out what they were and forgotten. It was an excellent walk... and one during which I was accompanied only by my own thoughts. An eagle re-engaged me in the world, and then we both left.
After Comber's, I came home and made dinner... and the previous solitary walk was so goo that I then decided to go walk on Chesterman Beach just after sunset. I had "Surfer Girl" stuck in my head the whole time.
This morning, I had breakfast with ULTE1, cleaned, and then went for a walk into town. I waited for check-ins that showed up late... and then walked to Tonquin and spent some time on the beach. It wasn't a solitary walk... which is fine... because it's always good to switch it up... especially since I live so much inside my own head that most of the time, the rest of the world could just not exist for all I cared.
It is important to not live so much inside one's own head, David Foster Wallace reminds me... which is why I'm so looking forward to sticker bombing! What would be a better way to engage with the rest of the world! I'm tempted to order more of those stickers from Texas even before the first batch arrives... and I'm so hoping it arrives soon.
It's not all about the surf, apparently. This is the best place on earth.
It's been super windy these past two days... gale warnings have been in effect for pretty much the entire weekend. It was windy enough that it not only ruined any chance of surfing, it even messed up the dive plans. Instead of doing what we had set out to do, we just went for a dive around the corner of Grice Point... going down to a maximum depth of 50ft. The visibility was about 6 ft. It was not exactly a fun dive. Added to that was some equipment issues... for dives in the past, I've been wearing my 5/4 zipperless hooded surf wetsuit which fits me perfectly well and therefore does not flush (except in serious surf). Everyone around here thinks I'm nuts, because those who are dumb enough (or impecunious enough) to dive in a wetsuit dive in a 7+7.... which totals 14mm where I have my 5mm, and 7mm where I have my 4mm. They got a whole bunch of all new wetsuits in, and they managed to convince me to try one of their new 7+7 suits. The women's suits didn't fit, so I had on a men's. As you can probably still remember even if you haven't seen me in a while, I am not shaped like a man (though I will have to do another paragraph on this later), so it flushed considerably more than my perfectly fitted surf wetsuit. To make it even more entertaining, I had 38 pounds on my weight belt as usual... and discovered upon descent (or attempt at descent) that another 9mm of neoprene basically meant that I wasn't going down. My bouancy options were float, and float higher. Blargh. Anyway... eventually it did all work out... and I got tangled up in a bed of kelp. Blargh.
There must be something wrong with me... because I'm really looking forward to the next dive.
Since I wasn't going surfing (couldn't surf on Friday night either... went for a walk on Schooner and Long Beach instead... it looked nasty at Cox (there were kite surfers out... never a good sign)) , I went to Comber's Beach for a walk instead. I hadn't been there for a couple of years. The last time I was there, it was with Tina during the winter of my 27th year... I remember drawing sierpinski gaskets in the sand. Comber's Beach was the first beach I saw on my first trip to Tofino on the May long weekend in 2006. We saw it at low tide, and there were many of this sort of jellyfish thing that seemed to have a sail. I've since found out what they were and forgotten. It was an excellent walk... and one during which I was accompanied only by my own thoughts. An eagle re-engaged me in the world, and then we both left.
After Comber's, I came home and made dinner... and the previous solitary walk was so goo that I then decided to go walk on Chesterman Beach just after sunset. I had "Surfer Girl" stuck in my head the whole time.
This morning, I had breakfast with ULTE1, cleaned, and then went for a walk into town. I waited for check-ins that showed up late... and then walked to Tonquin and spent some time on the beach. It wasn't a solitary walk... which is fine... because it's always good to switch it up... especially since I live so much inside my own head that most of the time, the rest of the world could just not exist for all I cared.
It is important to not live so much inside one's own head, David Foster Wallace reminds me... which is why I'm so looking forward to sticker bombing! What would be a better way to engage with the rest of the world! I'm tempted to order more of those stickers from Texas even before the first batch arrives... and I'm so hoping it arrives soon.
It's not all about the surf, apparently. This is the best place on earth.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Comber's Beach, 3 years later
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
Friday, June 19, 2009
The Miracle of Mindfulness
Years ago, during a late-night chat in the seedy Cambie Hotel bar, Csaba suggested that I read The Miracle of Mindfulness by Thich Nat Han. He wrote the title and author down on a beer-dampened coaster and handed it to me.
I did end up reading the book... but for a long while, it had been the last of its kind. Perhaps it was because the message of mindfulness was not contaminated by other similar thoughts of its kind that I was able to truly absorb its significance. The very simple idea of being mindful stuck with me... and eventually turned into the maxim "You cannot fault people for their limitations."
You cannot fault people for their limitations, nor can I fault myself for my limitations. The only difference with my own limitations is that I can remove them, slowly and deliberately. Last night, I paddled out at the corner at Cox Bay. It took me thirty minutes of solid paddling to get out. Wave after wave pushed me to shore, and I kept fighting my way out. During every other surf session of my entire life, I gave up under those conditions long before I hit the 15 minute mark. Yesterday, I paddled relentlessly for 30 minutes. When I got out past the break, the glassy swells were the prettiest I had ever seen... and as it turns out... it was overhead... which is a whole lot bigger than what I've gotten used to in the last two weeks. I caught one good ride on the green, and decided that it was a great surf day. The rest of the session involved me fighting my way back out once more (15 to 20 minutes of paddling out), catching a wave that closed out, and deciding that that was enough.
Limitations change. I change my limitations.
And the limitation of others-- I am actively (and I mean very actively, every day now) learning to accept with more mindfulness.
The wind seems to have picked up today. I cannot go surfing all the time. And as I'm certainly not planning on sitting around waiting for some guy to call who may not... I am going to do my first deep dive tomorrow morning. I'll be going to 100ft... focus is not optional.
I did end up reading the book... but for a long while, it had been the last of its kind. Perhaps it was because the message of mindfulness was not contaminated by other similar thoughts of its kind that I was able to truly absorb its significance. The very simple idea of being mindful stuck with me... and eventually turned into the maxim "You cannot fault people for their limitations."
You cannot fault people for their limitations, nor can I fault myself for my limitations. The only difference with my own limitations is that I can remove them, slowly and deliberately. Last night, I paddled out at the corner at Cox Bay. It took me thirty minutes of solid paddling to get out. Wave after wave pushed me to shore, and I kept fighting my way out. During every other surf session of my entire life, I gave up under those conditions long before I hit the 15 minute mark. Yesterday, I paddled relentlessly for 30 minutes. When I got out past the break, the glassy swells were the prettiest I had ever seen... and as it turns out... it was overhead... which is a whole lot bigger than what I've gotten used to in the last two weeks. I caught one good ride on the green, and decided that it was a great surf day. The rest of the session involved me fighting my way back out once more (15 to 20 minutes of paddling out), catching a wave that closed out, and deciding that that was enough.
Limitations change. I change my limitations.
And the limitation of others-- I am actively (and I mean very actively, every day now) learning to accept with more mindfulness.
The wind seems to have picked up today. I cannot go surfing all the time. And as I'm certainly not planning on sitting around waiting for some guy to call who may not... I am going to do my first deep dive tomorrow morning. I'll be going to 100ft... focus is not optional.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Sustainable Joy
All this talk of Joy has one of my friends wondering whether the Dalai Lama has hacked into my blog and commandeered it. I don't think the Dalai Lama is much of a hacker... but one never knows, now does one?
As the weekend approaches, I suppose some attention has been redirected to the question of whether or not this amazing surf crush will be in Tofino soon. Impossible to know... but one thing is for sure, that sticker is not going to be here before the weekend. I approved the final proof early yesterday morning, and by the afternoon, the custom vinyl cut-out decal for my new board was on its way to me.
I've had such a good time revelling in the possibilities these past weeks that I am a little fearful of change. Reality and knowledge can only limit possibilities... not expand them... which, I suppose, is whence came the cliché "ignorance is bliss." But I guess I'm going to find out one way or the other, sooner or later.
After some thought, I wonder whether my transference of so much energy into my new board is a pre-emptive coping mechanism... and then after further thought, I realize that I don't care if it is... because... what a beautiful board! How my whole life has changed! Look how it gleams in the sun! Think how many years of joy this board will bring! Calculate how many amazing rides I'll have! It is pure joy... and therefore pure good.
It is now two hours before meeting up with the surf team... when I get to show off my new boyfriend.
As the weekend approaches, I suppose some attention has been redirected to the question of whether or not this amazing surf crush will be in Tofino soon. Impossible to know... but one thing is for sure, that sticker is not going to be here before the weekend. I approved the final proof early yesterday morning, and by the afternoon, the custom vinyl cut-out decal for my new board was on its way to me.
I've had such a good time revelling in the possibilities these past weeks that I am a little fearful of change. Reality and knowledge can only limit possibilities... not expand them... which, I suppose, is whence came the cliché "ignorance is bliss." But I guess I'm going to find out one way or the other, sooner or later.
After some thought, I wonder whether my transference of so much energy into my new board is a pre-emptive coping mechanism... and then after further thought, I realize that I don't care if it is... because... what a beautiful board! How my whole life has changed! Look how it gleams in the sun! Think how many years of joy this board will bring! Calculate how many amazing rides I'll have! It is pure joy... and therefore pure good.
It is now two hours before meeting up with the surf team... when I get to show off my new boyfriend.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Dings
Damn. Almost put a ding in my board today. I have got to learn to be more careful!
Two sessions today... the waves weren't that great... and I am super tired.
Odd thing happened though... I was at the Incinerator Rock parking lot this afternoon, standing at the trunk of my Aerostar, staring at my beautiful fin sticking out of the board bag, about to change into my wetsuit, when I heard someone yell my name out of a silver pick up truck. People yell my name out of silver pick up trucks all the time... but I tend to know those license plates... not this one though... and I'd never seen that canopy before... it turned out to be an ex-coworker... who, by the time I left intel, was a hearings officer at PREC. She later took a one year leave of absence to work for the PNP program... and is now at the stage when she must decide whether to go back to the feds for a guaranteed paycheque every other week for the rest of her (it would undoubtedly become again) miserable life.
Been there.
And now I surf on a beautiful G&S 11' Noserider... and I play a surf-stoked receptionist who can dance on the ruins of a crumbling world... the most critical issue on my mind is not how to make the world a better place... but rather how I can get a vinyl cut-out sticker custom made for my new board.
My arms are jello. I must sleep.
Two sessions today... the waves weren't that great... and I am super tired.
Odd thing happened though... I was at the Incinerator Rock parking lot this afternoon, standing at the trunk of my Aerostar, staring at my beautiful fin sticking out of the board bag, about to change into my wetsuit, when I heard someone yell my name out of a silver pick up truck. People yell my name out of silver pick up trucks all the time... but I tend to know those license plates... not this one though... and I'd never seen that canopy before... it turned out to be an ex-coworker... who, by the time I left intel, was a hearings officer at PREC. She later took a one year leave of absence to work for the PNP program... and is now at the stage when she must decide whether to go back to the feds for a guaranteed paycheque every other week for the rest of her (it would undoubtedly become again) miserable life.
Been there.
And now I surf on a beautiful G&S 11' Noserider... and I play a surf-stoked receptionist who can dance on the ruins of a crumbling world... the most critical issue on my mind is not how to make the world a better place... but rather how I can get a vinyl cut-out sticker custom made for my new board.
My arms are jello. I must sleep.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Sneak Preview of 11ft of Beauty and Joy
Thursday, June 4, 2009
This day dies with aloo gobhi... mostly gobhi.
6:15 Alarm goes off... hit snooze... again... and again... and again...
6:30 Get out of bed, prepare breakfast for a full house: bake awesome scones (sundried tomatoes, rosemary, and white cheddar (yes, I insist on the oxford comma))... wash and cut 6 types of fruits... brew coffee... &c &c
7:25 Shower
7:40 Go to work. Answer phone-- play receptionist all day.
13:00 Go to co-op grocery. Buy and consume strawberry flavoured kefir for lunch while reading Dalai Lama's Becoming Enlightened. Experience a small moment of panic as I realized that I seriously considered vegetarianism for an instant. (Don't blame ULTE2, he's actually recently become omnivorous again.)
16:35 Go home. Put a few bars of warm surf wax in the fridge.
16:40 Clean two rooms and three bathrooms... wash and fold a few loads of laundry.
18:50 Make iced tea with lemon. Eat two oranges and half a slice of previously baked frozen pizza that has (apparently) been in the fridge too long. Realize that I really want some aloo gobhi, but won't have time before the 2nd sunset session with the newly formed DoT surf team to cook. Get ready to go for a surf.
19:05 Throw wetsuit and mitts in Aerostar. Drive to co-op groceries and buy cauliflower and cilantro.
19:30 Arrive at Long Beach. Get in wetsuit. Realized that I had forgotten the refrigerated wax at home. Smear warm melty wax on board.
19:45 Join the surf team in the water. Spent about half an hour wondering what the hell I was doing. Miss a whole lot of waves... catch some... get some time on the green (I can almost be blasé about this... but not quite... time on the green is still a big deal for me...) Enjoy the surf, the sun, the company. Spot four sea lions. Realize that I'm surrounded by sea lions. Small moment of panic.
21:15 Get out of the water. Drive back to town.
21:30 Shower... realized that total food consumption for the day was a glass of orange juice, kefir, two oranges, ice tea, half a slice of bad bad bad pizza, and a limonata.
22:05 Decide that it's never too late for aloo gobhi. Cannot find hing. Find hing. Make aloo gobhi. While aloo gobhi is cooking, clean dishes and kitchen, and eat some left over raw gobhi. Overcook aloo gobhi because dishes took longer than expected.
23:30 Eat aloo gobhi in front of computer-- overcooked, slightly mushy... but otherwise good. See left over raw gobhi. Due to recent eating habits, cannot resist eating leftover raw gobhi. Eat all leftover raw gobhi down to the stump.
00:25 Sitting in front of computer looking at bowl of left over aloo gobhi and raw gobhi stump. Decide that it's time for bed. Realise that I managed to squeeze a lot out of today. If I were ever asked what I did on the 20th anniversary of the Tiananmen Square Massacre, I will say that I surfed and ate cauliflower..
6:30 Get out of bed, prepare breakfast for a full house: bake awesome scones (sundried tomatoes, rosemary, and white cheddar (yes, I insist on the oxford comma))... wash and cut 6 types of fruits... brew coffee... &c &c
7:25 Shower
7:40 Go to work. Answer phone-- play receptionist all day.
13:00 Go to co-op grocery. Buy and consume strawberry flavoured kefir for lunch while reading Dalai Lama's Becoming Enlightened. Experience a small moment of panic as I realized that I seriously considered vegetarianism for an instant. (Don't blame ULTE2, he's actually recently become omnivorous again.)
16:35 Go home. Put a few bars of warm surf wax in the fridge.
16:40 Clean two rooms and three bathrooms... wash and fold a few loads of laundry.
18:50 Make iced tea with lemon. Eat two oranges and half a slice of previously baked frozen pizza that has (apparently) been in the fridge too long. Realize that I really want some aloo gobhi, but won't have time before the 2nd sunset session with the newly formed DoT surf team to cook. Get ready to go for a surf.
19:05 Throw wetsuit and mitts in Aerostar. Drive to co-op groceries and buy cauliflower and cilantro.
19:30 Arrive at Long Beach. Get in wetsuit. Realized that I had forgotten the refrigerated wax at home. Smear warm melty wax on board.
19:45 Join the surf team in the water. Spent about half an hour wondering what the hell I was doing. Miss a whole lot of waves... catch some... get some time on the green (I can almost be blasé about this... but not quite... time on the green is still a big deal for me...) Enjoy the surf, the sun, the company. Spot four sea lions. Realize that I'm surrounded by sea lions. Small moment of panic.
21:15 Get out of the water. Drive back to town.
21:30 Shower... realized that total food consumption for the day was a glass of orange juice, kefir, two oranges, ice tea, half a slice of bad bad bad pizza, and a limonata.
22:05 Decide that it's never too late for aloo gobhi. Cannot find hing. Find hing. Make aloo gobhi. While aloo gobhi is cooking, clean dishes and kitchen, and eat some left over raw gobhi. Overcook aloo gobhi because dishes took longer than expected.
23:30 Eat aloo gobhi in front of computer-- overcooked, slightly mushy... but otherwise good. See left over raw gobhi. Due to recent eating habits, cannot resist eating leftover raw gobhi. Eat all leftover raw gobhi down to the stump.
00:25 Sitting in front of computer looking at bowl of left over aloo gobhi and raw gobhi stump. Decide that it's time for bed. Realise that I managed to squeeze a lot out of today. If I were ever asked what I did on the 20th anniversary of the Tiananmen Square Massacre, I will say that I surfed and ate cauliflower..
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Democracy
It was *the* word in 1989. I was living in Hong Kong and was among those who poured into the streets to march in protest. I was entirely too young to appreciate the significance of the march... and in fact, even today, I could not pinpoint exactly what we were protesting.
For a brief moment in history, people cared profoundly. And even if I were to try, I could not fail to remember 1989 on every June 4th. Twenty years later, I'm sitting on my longboard in the surf as the sun sets over long beach... and I think of 1989.
I watched this today and cried:
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/tankman/
For a brief moment in history, people cared profoundly. And even if I were to try, I could not fail to remember 1989 on every June 4th. Twenty years later, I'm sitting on my longboard in the surf as the sun sets over long beach... and I think of 1989.
I watched this today and cried:
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/tankman/
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Zen and the Art of Surfboard Maintenance
I confess that I've never read the book... motorcycle maintenance didn't sound much like a metaphor I'd appreciate anyway. But surfboards, those, I understand.
When you buy a brand new surfboard, they're smooth and shiny and beautiful. If you have any intention of surfing on it (some buy them for display, I think), you rub a layer of surf wax on the deck for traction. Surf wax keeps you on the board, so it would be useless if it were anything other than super tacky. Being super tacky, however, the wax traps a lot of dirt. And as you layer on more wax (and more dirt) each session, the board gets quickly covered in a thick grey armour of sticky, dirty, cement-coloured wax. To a non-surfer, a well-seasoned surfboard would appear visually and tactilely unattractive.
Once the wax build-up reaches a sort of a "critical mass," it tends to fall off the board in chunky flakes. This is an indicator that it's time to strip the board and start over. Yesterday, I stripped both my boards. I laid out my boards wax-side-up on my sunny back lawn (which shall be no more in a couple of weeks) and, with the help of the warmth of the sun, scraped off a year's build up of wax to reveal two just-off-the-shelf-beautiful boards.
The boards are smooth and shiny and beautiful again. How's that for a metaphor?
When you buy a brand new surfboard, they're smooth and shiny and beautiful. If you have any intention of surfing on it (some buy them for display, I think), you rub a layer of surf wax on the deck for traction. Surf wax keeps you on the board, so it would be useless if it were anything other than super tacky. Being super tacky, however, the wax traps a lot of dirt. And as you layer on more wax (and more dirt) each session, the board gets quickly covered in a thick grey armour of sticky, dirty, cement-coloured wax. To a non-surfer, a well-seasoned surfboard would appear visually and tactilely unattractive.
Once the wax build-up reaches a sort of a "critical mass," it tends to fall off the board in chunky flakes. This is an indicator that it's time to strip the board and start over. Yesterday, I stripped both my boards. I laid out my boards wax-side-up on my sunny back lawn (which shall be no more in a couple of weeks) and, with the help of the warmth of the sun, scraped off a year's build up of wax to reveal two just-off-the-shelf-beautiful boards.
The boards are smooth and shiny and beautiful again. How's that for a metaphor?
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